No Matter Where You Go, He Is There!

The past summer was tough summer for me, and being back at Olivet has really refreshed me (spiritually, not physically...physically I'm exhausted). Anyway, today in chapel we sang the song "Even if I Fall" by Mike Cowart and Michelle Valley. I started thinking back on my summer - I started out so excited, I was pumped to start a devotion with the teen girls at my church, and I had plans to do many exciting things during the summer (beyond my expectation to be paid minimum wage, the first failure).

Unfortunately, the devotion with the girls didn't work out, because summers at Chapman church are so hectic it's impossible to have a set schedule. So I had to cancel the devotion. And then beyond work I began to realize I would not do ANYTHING else, besides going to a couple movies (and my sister and nephew visiting a couple weeks). So I was kind of stuck in this endless rut of work, sleep, work, sleep, teach Sunday School (which was great, I love kindergartners). I was sucked dry of everything, and I was sick of everything. Although I will say that General Assembly was fantastic, and Disney World was a great way to end my summer.

Then, I started thinking I wouldn't be able to come back to Olivet, and I started to panic. I was running out of options and I finally flat-out ran out of hope. But when I finally announced to my roommates that I might not be coming back, one of my roommates (Ember) told me about someone who helped her and could also help me. I contacted the guy and started praying even harder...I had no idea what to expect. Slowly (in His time) God started answering my prayers. Now, I'm back at Olivet, and I get to stay (comfortably, without stressing about finances). God also helped me work everything out with my classes...my schedule just fell into place right before my eyes.

I guess I'm trying to talk about something that I've talked about before: lack of faith. Before when I wrote, I was dealing with lack of faith on one specific issue, not with my entire life/future. That was my big test this summer: trusting God with my ENTIRE life. If it is supposed to happen, it will happen. If it doesn't happen, something bigger and better will fall into place. And I just have to learn to be OK with that...maybe it won't happen, or maybe it just won't happen in my time. But whatever does happen, God wants it to, it's His plan. We have to be OK with letting go of the reins. And I do NOT mean letting God step in every once in a while when we lose control. I mean completely handing over the reins and never, never, EVER taking them back.

That's the most difficult part for most of us. We like to be in control of every situation, we think we know everything about ourselves and can plan our entire future, but we can't, we're too stupid (you know, compared to God). And so here's my test for you, and it's going to be a hard one. Write down all your dreams, all your plans for the future, your hopes, your desires, anything and everything you want from a career or a family on down to your dream car. Now I'm going to ask you to do what we always have to do in chapel (and may think is dumb) but I changed it a little so I want you to just do it (and mean it). Hold your hands palms up, but in fists (so hold out your fists with fingers aimed toward the sky). Think about every single dream and desire you have. Now tell God you don't want control over them any more, you don't want to worry about them any more, you don't want them to be your focus over Him. Tell God that it's going to be hard for you to give over the control and you might want to fight for control back sometimes, but ask Him for His help and guidance every SINGLE step of the way. And then when you're ready, open your hands and allow God to TAKE your hopes and wishes out of your hands. Let Him take everything that you're holding onto. And then remember the paper with everything you wrote down? I want you to rip it up into as many pieces as possible, get a sticky note, and write the only plan for the future you need: God's Plan.

So yeah...this will be really difficult, I know exactly what it's like. But I guarantee you the 100% guarantee that if you do this, God will set you free. Obviously you'll have to keep praying for His help and guidance along the way. You can't expect to just give it all up one time and not struggle with taking control ever again. So continue praying, continue praying to God for His direction in your life instead of what you want. It is so, so incredibly worth it.



"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see...By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God's command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible...And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."
-Hebrews 11:1,3,6